He hasn't forgotten.
- Kate Crawford
- Mar 8, 2017
- 3 min read

Isn't it funny?
We ask and beg and pray and fast for God to provide, pour out, or change things in our lives, and when it doesn't happen, displeasure comes quickly and puts a wedge between your heart and God's love. Your ears and God's voice.
But Life goes on.
You keep pursuing, keep loving, even though there's a slight sense of distrust you push through and continue to love Jesus, just as much as the day you first met.
Then one day, you lift your head and you realise... You're in the midst of the very thing you asked God for long ago.
Without even realising it, God swept in, remained faithful and did exactly as His word says, He never left your prayer unanswered.
Two years ago, I was in the midst of turmoil, brokenness, and shattered confidence. As a result, I was stuck in a cycle of verbal and emotional vomit.
There wasn't a single catch-up, a coffee, a dinner date or a meeting where I wasn't the one constantly talking... and crying... and talking.
All I could talk about, all I could bring up was me, myself and my issues.
(Lord Jesus, bless my poor friends abundantly for this time. May they reap bountifully for those exhausting talks!)
I noticed it. I knew I was doing it. And it frustrated the living death out of me.
So I prayed. I sought. I begged. I pleaded with God to make me someone who talked less about myself and listened more to other people's issues.
Someone who didn't offload or be so self-absorbed, but rather someone who listened, and helped other people.
I remember wanting this so clearly that in 2015, one my three Calvary Leadership College student goals for the year was to simply "Talk less, Say more".
Well, it's 2017, and as I was walking in the city with a friend from university, I realised I had said minimal in our total 30 minutes of time together since leaving the lecture.
It was in that very moment that I recalled some of the encounters with friends and family I'd had in the last week.
Sure enough, I'd played the role of the listener.
Not to sound pretentious but I went from the insistent, emotional talker to talking less, but saying more. And when I did say something, it was to uplift, encourage or give perspective.
God delivered on His promise, and I was too blind sighted by disappointment to notice.
Sometimes when we're in a tough situation, we get told: "Not in your timing, but His".
While that response is biblically accurate, it's still an infuriating response.
It just seems like a weak, empty, classic Christian response that we tend to hand out to a hurting fellow-Christian when we have nothing better to say.
Turns out, it is a powerful truth that can radicalise the way we view trials and prolonged or delayed promises.
As I was telling this to a friend, the Holy Spirit dropped this into my heart:
Two years ago, I desperately wanted this frustrating, ugly characteristic removed (or "cleansed", if you will) from my life, but during that time in my life, I didn't need to talk less.
I needed to talk the pain out.
I needed to cry.
I needed to process.
I needed to let my friends support me.
And God knew that more than I did.
Somewhere in between then and now, the request to talk less and say more fell off my prayer requests for self-awareness and maturity.
Somewhere along the line, it stopped being the most important flaw.
Somewhere along the line, I was disappointed that God didn't deliver.
Now, in this season, I lifted my eyes to look beyond my situation and disappointment, only to realise that God has delivered.
And not because I need it, but because other people do.
God doesn't need me to talk less for my sake, but for the benefit of His children around me.
Not for me but for my friends, my family, my workmates and my university peers.
It's a small realisation but it's been a powerful one.
Delayed promises are just that... delayed.
So whatever promise you were believing God for, whether it was two months, two years or two decades ago, be reminded and encouraged that God does deliver, He does have your back and He hasn't forgotten.
"How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How vast is the sum of them! If I should count them, they would outnumber the sand. When I awake, I am still with You."
- Psalm 139:17-18
With all my love,

- Kate xo
Comments